My son is not normally a trouble maker and is a good student, well behaved, and well mannered. However he did seem to get himself into a pickle. In September (11 years old at the time) he was hanging out with two neighborhood boys who were 14. The friendship did not last long because I didn’t like the behavior of the older boys so I stopped allowing my son to hang around with them.

Well, I just found out today, that while they were hanging out together there was incident where the older boys broke the door to a vacant building that had just been badly damaged by a flood. The three of them went into the building and there were items in the building that belonged to the owner. The three of them took some cans of soda that they had found and left the building. According to my son, (he wasn’t lying, I can tell when he lies to me) he did not break the door but he did say he is guilty of going into the building and taking the sodas.
Don’t get me wrong, I know what he did is very wrong, and I want him punished for his actions but I also believe he was heavily influenced by the older boys because this whole situation is very out of character for him. Well today a police officer came by my house (which is how I became aware of the incident) and wants me and my son to go speak to him tomorrow after school. Here is my dilemma, I want my son punished for what he did but I am confident that a punishment that I impose upon him would teach him a lesson instead of a punishment imposed by a court of law. I don’t want him to end up with a juvenile record and the stigma that follows over something he did not understand the full ramifications of.
While I would like for son to go speak to the officer and tell him the truth of what happened on that day, he is admitting guilt. I am aware of my sons part in the incident but the officer did not state how much damage was done, or what items were taken from the building (i got that info from my son.) I do not want my son to admit to being there and then find out that the older boys went back to the location, caused more damage, or removed more items. Should we just go talk to the officer ourselves or would you suggest having the advice of an attorney, or an attorney present during questioning? Thanks in advance, any info is appreciated.
I took the advice of mikeysco and a few other people who suggested I talk to the officer first to get an idea of what happened and what questions he planned to ask my son. Well I found out that what my son told me was the truth, the only items taken were a few cans of soda and the only damage was to the door. The officer advised me that the 3 boys will be charged with burglary no matter if my son talks to him or not. After I left the detectives office I contacted an attorney and was advised to have my son speak with the detective so he can provide his side of the story. I also found out that the building that they had gone into wasn’t a persons home it was an emergency food pantry and cold weather shelter for the needy. This makes me even more mad at my son. Monday after school I plan to take him to the shelter to have him apologize and I am also going to ask if there is any volunteer work he can do so he gets an idea of what life is like for the people he stole from.
I don’t think my son knew it was a shelter and food pantry for the needy but it doesn’t matter really, stealing is stealing and it just goes to show that you never know whose life it is going to effect. I guess no matter how bad it hurts me to see him have to go through this, I can’t protect him from the effects of his actions. I just hope that he learns from this mistake instead of it being an introduction to a life long history involved with the justice system.

Tags: Attorney, crime, implicated, police, should, Talk, Year